Recently I have decided to vastly change my life. In order to do this I took everything I do for reasons I don’t wholly stand behind and quit them cold turkey. It might sound a little dramatic but I did this because truly I had just had enough of dedicating my time to things that weren’t for me. Things I was just doing because they were a part of my routine.
It is a difficult step to begin thinking about what you really want to do with your life. The line between what you want to do, what you actually do, and what you are expected to do is a blurry one if it is a line at all – and I for one cannot tell you. What I can tell you is that in lieu of doing all the things that were taking up my time before, I have dedicated the present to figuring out exactly what I want to do in the future and doing exclusively that. I began by writing a list. On the top of this list I wrote that I needed to start focusing on myself and the things that I wanted to accomplish to make myself happy. I did this about two months ago. Yes I know this is a very recent development. But within the two months of my boring dismal life detox I have made more drastic changes than I could have ever imagined.
I made my first change when I went back to art school to finish a degree. I had been postponing school for as long as possible while travelling through South East Asia trying to find myself. As it turns out I found myself a few weeks after this epic soul searching journey and not during… sitting in a dark apartment, binge-eating organic Buddha Bowl popcorn and generally being sad about stuff I couldn’t understand.
The next change I made was breaking up with my long term boyfriend (with whom I had been travelling around Asia and currently shared an apartment with). Without getting into the details, it was a sticky situation and a very hard decision to make.
I have always wanted a motorcycle. Ever since I was a skinny little tomboy in cuffed GAP jeans all I wanted was to cruise through the Nevada desert on a bike, my hair flowing behind me and open road stretching out in front of me. So, naturally, when I was 16 my dad bought me a Vespa. Really generous dad, but not exactly the image I had in mind. So this past month I finally traded up and got my motorcycle. Driving it is the best, most amazing feeling of accomplishment ever.
Another struggle for me was turning down the easy and reliable retail or serving jobs I could hold while in school. For some reason I just couldn’t commit this time. There was something abstract holding me back from folding sweaters, and the poverty that would ensue from not folding the sweaters just wasn’t scary enough. Lately having so much time on my hands I have been able to start styling for photo shoots and films, and getting paid for it! So now I work about once a week, on set, with amazing creative people. No folding sweaters involved.
Within the month I am throwing a massive Halloween party at an awesome art gallery downtown. At the party there will be a DJ, dancing, performance artist, sculptures, a butt shaped birthday cake accompanied by amazing poster one of my favourite collage artists designed for the event. I am throwing this party for me, it isn’t trendy, its just fun, and it is exactly the party I have wanted to attend for years. I guess this doesn’t count as a change, but it is definitely something I never thought I was capable of planning before. Or maybe it’s just something I never would have taken the time to do.
Lastly, but not least, I have began eating a much more healthy plant based diet.
The Importance of Doing You
Two months! I did all of this in two months, and aside from how great each of these little victories has felt for me, it feels even better to know that I did these things on my own not knowing how they would turn out. I literally sat down one day and said to myself I really want to focus on me, and the moment I did everything began falling into place. We all have our struggles and making each of these changes was very difficult in its own way. But I pulled it off! And now I feel like I am treating myself the way I deserve to be treated. I feel more like me than I have in years. Everything I do now, what I eat, what I wear, how I earn money is solely based on what will make me happy and not one other soul on this Earth can take that away from me.
Need ideas on how you can make quick changes to start getting your yes supply? Let us know in the comments below.